Being Clear

Last week was a rough one when it came to content creation. Postpartum mood swings, the culmination of six weeks of interrupted sleep, and some less-than-ideal weather definitely took their toll and creating content for the blog is what took a back seat compared to doing well in my class and keeping my family alive.

That being said, it was a great week for self-reflection. The root of my self-reflection has been forgiveness, but not forgiveness of others (I think I’m fairly solid there). Rather, it is forgiveness of myself that I focused on.

I’ll be candid, what I mostly need to do is forgive myself when it comes to mood swings. My hormonal rollercoaster has been a lot more intense following the birth of my son, Michael, and it is the people I love the most that have been bearing the brunt of that. It was a relief to ask for help.

I also need to forgive myself for not being as productive as I would like when it comes to my obligations outside of my family. I have a piece that needs to be updated (that’s next after writing this) and feelings of self-loathing have been creeping in. I am grateful to those in my life who give me space (maybe without even realizing it) to work through my brain.

Our brains can be strange, and sometimes unpleasant, places. I am so grateful to have the clarity (although it doesn’t feel all that clear sometimes) and space to process and forgive myself. I hope I am able to provide the same for others.

Photo by Magne Træland on Unsplash

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