I couldn’t be more thrilled to host Karin Ulik, to talk about self-care and how prioritization plays into making us the best versions of ourselves.
Over the years there were times I felt like I was doing a great job as a mother; my kids were growing and happy, they weren’t fighting with each other and I felt balanced between home and work.
Then there were times, more often than I like to admit, that I felt like I was failing miserably; there wasn’t enough time left over after the work was done to play, to talk, to just hang out together. And focus on my marriage. And find time to be me, the individual.
I wasn’t unhappy, in fact, I considered myself very happy. Yet I felt like there was more–like something was missing. Then my oldest started college shopping, it became very clear to me that choosing a school is challenging because as teens we haven’t studied who we are and what we truly want from life.
Since those are really tough questions, we follow society’s path to a successful life– we go to school, start a career, then a family, work hard to one day retire and enjoy life – and expect that we’ll eventually figure it out. Except that most don’t. Instead we try to have it all and soon find that we’re trapped in a hamster wheel that’s rolling downhill and picking up speed.
You may be thinking, “But I have thought about what I want, and my life still feels out of balance”. Yep, that’s what I thought, too. I had a very good sense of what I wanted and built my life around it. The issue was that I didn’t have the right formula to put it all together.
Once I figured out the formula to being me, everything changed. Are there times I’m on the path to overwhelm? Yes. But now I know how to recognize it and turn it around before I feel out of control. You can figure it out, too. And you don’t have to do it alone. I can help you get started right now. Let’s look at it as simply as possible.
The first thing you need to understand is that you cause your own overwhelm by thinking thoughts about how much and I can’t. Here are a few examples: “I am so busy. I just have too much to do.” Or “This is a lot to learn. I can’t digest it all.” Or even, “I have so many people to take care of. I can’t do it all.”
Next you need to create some space to slow down, clear you mind and think. From there you can create a plan. Most often when we are overwhelmed, it’s not because we’re doing so much. It’s because we’re not getting enough of the right things done so we’re spinning.
As you create your plan, it’s important to understand all that is on your plate and how you truly feel about it. The formula for true balance comes from placing enough emphasis on the things that make you feel most whole while keeping the things you don’t truly enjoy to a minimum.
If you’d like to go a little deeper, I invite you to download the “Eliminate Overwhelm & Burnout” worksheet and be notified when free enrollment my upcoming mini-workshop “The Art of Life Balance” opens. Ready? .
Karin Ulik is a personal coach and speaker who helps busy parents who are stretched too thin escape and recreate & balance their lives. She also helps their teens discover their post-high school dreams and take the right action to make it reality. Check out Karin’s blog and follow her on Facebook or Instagram.